No one’s talking about the real problem with everyone working from home:

I can’t put all the reusable plastic coffee mugs away because my system relies on Erin having at least five of them in the passenger footwell of her car at any one time. Now they’re all in the house and the cupboard they go in is full.

@haruki_zaemon My daughter uses House Party... pretty sure she talks to her iOS friend on it. Honestly don't know that much about it but we looked into and discussed safety before allowing her to have it.

Trying to find a video chat tool for my kids they can run on iPads, don’t require a phone number, specifically for use with their friends who don’t have iOS (and this FaceTime).

The announcement that New Zealand will annex Australia can’t come soon enough.

$Partner just had a great idea for a campaign. Remember the old STD ads? “You’re not just sleeping with one person, you’re sleeping with everyone they slept with as well.” We need something like this for COVID-19.

$Partner’s laptop shat itself today 😱 Thankfully, we had an old one I managed to resurrect. Thank fuck iCloud finally works as advertised.

It never ceases to amaze me how good my kids are at pretending they don’t find my jokes funny.

AUSTRALIAN PARENTS:

There are new episodes of Bluey available now on ABC iView.

alcohol 

@haruki_zaemon ‘oh no there’s zombies beating the door. How does this go again? Put on my chaps, eye protection, earmuffs. Check chain tension and brake function, yep. Check fuel and bar oil, good. Tap the dust filter clear if it needs it. Nice. Decompression button. Chain brake on. Pull the trigger, set the switch to start, pull the cord. Keep going. Is it coughing? Good! Set the switch to idle, no, to idle, nahhh oh you’ve fucken flooded it now. Put it over there and get the other s...’

I'd love to see this output the rate of newstart and call it "work for the dole mutual obligation"

RT @NegusX3@twitter.com

Umm... this is fucking amazing

LOL as half the world (re)discovers hand washing and the other half deny the existence of something they can’t see—until the weekend when that perspective is hard to reconcile with other practices.

Another story about my former boss. He used to do regular bar stocktakes of one of the gentlemen’s clubs in Sydney, not like strip club, like dining club. They had an arrangement: pour your own drink from the bar, sign a chit, pay your bill monthly. It was always monstrously in the red.

The barman explained to him that they just increased the annual fees to cover the shortfall, satisfying everyone: it was more exclusive that way, and the members were happy to go on stealing from each other

Oh hai. It’s been a week and it’s only Monday!

Show more
Aus.Social

Welcome to thundertoot! A Mastodon Instance for 'straya