Today is the last day of my spinning course 😭 It's been one of the best things I've done. The Guild run a certificate course which takes 18 months (one class per month), although the next intake won't be until April so I have a while to think about it.

I love deadlines, especially when they are today. So I’ve got until 23:59:59…

Time to put the kettle on.

*headdesk* Of course that’s happening. You’re APPENDING to the file, not creating from scratch. Twit.

For some reason, I take a certain satisfaction in finding defects in code that I have written that is in production, but nobody has ever noticed.

Today’s musical serendipity was diving into the album Widow’s Weeds by Tristania. Would call this an “associated act” of Sirenia, as there is some cross-over of personnel (and style.)

Østen Bergøy’s vocals on Angellore suggest to me that someone’s been listening to Andrew Eldritch.

Can't you see
Tell me why
You still linger in a world of strife
Your heart bleeds
You're dead inside
Love to you is like cyanide

Trying to find some, any, motivation to work - beyond having a deadline, getting paid, etc. Just. So. Wiped. Out.

Not sure if it’s exercise-related; think I’m now in a stable relationship with seroquel, so don’t think it’s that.

Trying to motivate myself with Goth Metal in the form of Sirenia*. There is always the risk of developing an artistic inferiority complex from the sheer talent of Morten Veland.

* Emmanuelle Zoldan vocals.

Of the things that seem to be improving since my recent medical incidents, it looks like my hair has started growing again. Oh, still with the receded hairline, but length-wise. Yeah, it’s great to get cognitive function back (and then some,) but if I can have long hair again, I can totally rock the middle-aged Goth Metal look.

More the skeleton body electric violin (which I have) than the flying-V guitar (which is the sign of a middle-aged crisis.)

Hoorah, after a bad-brain day yesterday (until I hit the benzos) I seem to be OK today, if horribly tired, and just remembered about Schwartzian transforms which is totally what I need to get what I’m doing working.

Ooh, I’m getting vaguely interesting stuff assigned to me. Actually, having spent a long time freelancing, just getting stuff assigned (and paid for doing it on the nail) is a Good Thing™

Pork fillet, Slape’s Greek rosemary and garlic sausages, tomato, courgette, S&P, chicken stock, Chardonnay, cumin, coriander, allspice, garlic, ginger, tamarind paste, borlotti beans (2 cans.)

Hmm, seems like Toot is broken in the attaching videos department, so here's a still, instead.

Oh, wow, such choice. No version of the Xilinx ISE for MacOS (no surprises there,) just Windows and Linux. So I go to download the obvious choice (Linux) but find it’s only RedHat.

Windows 7 version, here I come! At least I’ve got an official MSFT-provided VM to run it on.

Anyhows, a lot of weird shit has happened recently, still trying to unwind a load of it myself, but I think we’re about 99% positive stuff, I’ve been very sick, for a very long time, now I’m not (sick that is, not a long time,) and right now, I’m dangerous, and to myself, but highly self-aware, so not worrying about it, because I know what’s going on, and am accomodating.

…bugger in the local health system knows, and respects Fred - and seem a bit in awe of him. From my perspective, he’s a really nice guy to deal with, and I can recognise one hell of a professional. Who is probably better qualified than the shrink. (I’ve known a few nurses; my trust factor compared to anyone calling themself “Doctor” who isn’t a real one (ie: has PhD) is orders of magnitude apart.

Barring @TechnicalKO, who probably knows me better than anyone, I’ve managed to freak out pretty much my entire support team, but now there seems to be some acceptance. Saw my GP yesterday, NOT whilst manic, and could see him relaxing. Have a tele-consult tomorrow with a shrink, as part of my having caused another GP to hit the MH Panic Button (and bugger, I’m impressed - it works) with Fred. I’m not entirely sure what Fred’s qualifications are (I’m assuming an RN) but every last…

So, after a few years where getting over 15 hours of work into a week was like something to celebrate (8-12, and struggling, more the norm) - Clockify tells me that I’ve nearly hit 18 hours since Monday, my eyes are still pretty much OK, and I’ve still got this evening, and three more days to go. (I work 7/7, due to former incapacity.)

Nett result: can clear down debt, acquire some awesome kit that we’re all going to have fun with, and do a bit of micro-philanthropy.

I'm an auld fart, I can see the attractions of 3D printing, but want to do my making in the old, subtractive ways. And that includes photolithography, and anodic precision machining.

Who's in for the ride? Got ideas? I want to hear them.

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