Genuinely asking someone about their day and letting them talk, with minor prompts to keep them going allows them to reflect on their day as if you were present, and perhaps change the way they interact with themselves as we give them a chance to see their world through our eyes.

imagine constructing comedy such that its simple to re-tell to friends at the pub.

Those movies you know so well you can watch them as a radio plays.

it feels like figuring out the meaning of life honestly. and I aint even 42.

It's like the sky opened up and gave me a gift. I now know who I am and what I want. and i'm the same as everyone else except I've never heard it in these terms.

"I want a partner who I can work together with to fulfill our wildest dreams, whatever they may be"

it's such a simple statement, and something I have felt forever just never had the phrase to explain it. And perhaps i dream a little big, but whatever.

My life appears to keep getting worse, not better. It's an illusion in my head, but that doesn't make it any less difficult to deal with. I'm really struggling and i have no avenues of support that work. I honestly don't know how to escape from this funk that has settled on my existence, and i'm hoping something happens soon because something is going to happen, it must, people can do insane things to escape their pain.

God forbid any dictator figures out how to be the worlds biggest celebrity.. doh..

can you imagine the time when we are really and truly a multi-planetary species, and a natural catastrophe happens on another planet, like a meteor impact, how helpless you would feel to watch such an impact on a real civilisation.

I was listening to good music when these thoughts occurred to me.

Its like the skies a parted and the doors to the future were opened right in front of my very ears.

Such a simple thought and the reasons I'm sad most of the time mellts away.

That person I was and those people that were around when those bad things happened don't exist anymore, I'm significantly different to who I was, and so must they be.. so its a sort of birth of an idea that you aren't who you think you were, so this new person you are, was born when you weren't looking, who are they?

I think a fundamental problem with humans happens when they lose faith that what they do has meaning, and the way they do it expresses that meaning even down to the mundane actions you take each day. Even if you don't put any effort into it. Even if you don't notice. You rarely get credit for that value even though it exists in every facet of your life.

So... Thank you.
You matter and what you do matters and has value, thank you for waking up every day and working on your passions.

Yay I may have recruited more people for my irl social network. its good to have good people around you..

The strangest cognitive dissonance I experience is to genuinely want to improve the existence of others, and yet sometimes take actions that would negatively impact their lives, either out of necessity, or plain old everyday selfishness.. and honestly it's terrifying to observe yourself when that happens. because it raises question of how much control the average person has over their behaviour? is this normal? am i above the average? or below it? does it matter? We're doing the best we can.

So it took a week to return to mostly normal, and then a strange falling out with one of my longest running friends happened which took me by surprise, and made me doubt where there was no doubt before. I've been seriously contemplating moving to Melbourne and looking for work. I definitely need to move somewhere other than here, I feel like I've worn out my welcome in Adelaide simply by existing without socially accepted personal development. It only took 37 years of being a wierdo loser.

Go to a nightclub to sit in the corner on reddit because I enjoy the loud music. Meh.

OK looks like the battle over vulnerability isn't in the moment, but is in the recovery period. This week has been super hard for my mental health. My self talk has been super negative, and whilst intellectually I know that what I say to myself is not true, unfortunately that doesn't help with the feelings. I could do with a win, but as I get older the wins come fewer and farther between, or rather the rewards feel less and less. I guess thats why its so tempting to turn to self medication.

I've been seeing more real people in mainstream media as celebrities who are humble and stressed out, but who just happen to be excellent at the thing people like them for.

You ever have those days where you are so overwhelmed by the kindness of your friends you burst into tears in gratitude? even doubled because its not even that they are doing anything different today, but that you are a moron for not appreciating them that much, sooner?

i just asked out and got rejected by a girl, and yet i still consider it a win due to overcoming my anxiety about the whole thing. it really is all about the narrative you tell yourself.

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